*If you are looking for how to impliment this strategy for yourself or another adult, read this post here.

Sometimes children need help co-regulating their big emotions, especially ones like anxiety. Even if your child does not have an anxiety disorder, they may have periods where they are experiencing excess worry and may need help calming their nervous systems.

This is a great straegy to get your child to calm down, and teach them how to regulate on their own.

This is also a great strategy for teachers and child care workers - so feel free to save this to come back to!

Step One: Look for five things around you.

It is important that you hook the child in with this. Use an excited tone and drop down to the child’s level if needed. You want to engage the child and redirect their attention to this fun activity. If the child is resistant, demonstrate by pointing things out. It is best to point out details, and get the child's attention to really focus.

Think of pointing out a small tree in a picture or the color of the corner of the room—something less obvious and something that interests the child.

If the child is reluctant, demonstrate the task for them. If they aren’t able to regulate to find five things, you can do this for them. For example, you might say:

Wow this is easy! I see… a water bottle, a trash can, a picture, ect.
That’s okay if you aren’t ready to talk - I’ll help you!
Five things might be hard to name - do you see at least one?

Avoid scolding the child if they are reluctant. Try to engage them by using their hands and fingers to point things out if it’s age appropriate.

Step Two: Touch five things.

Now that you have hooked the child in with the first activity, this step can encourage the child to move their body a bit and get their minds to focus on another sensor, touch.

Try to let the child lead as much as possible.

If they are resistant, suggest something they are already wearing or invite them to touch something they might not get to otherwise, such as a necklace or a super soft toy from the top shelf.

It’s important to slow down at every step and ask lots of questions as appropriate, such as:

What does that remind you of?
What does this feel like?
Have you ever felt this before?
Do you have something similar at home?

Step Three: Find three things you can hear.

Invite the child to be still and calm. This is a point where if they have been reluctant to participate, they may be able to settle here.

One of the suggestions you can give here is to ask if the child can hear their heart. This encourages children to tune into their bodies after being calmed by the first two activities.

This may also give you insights into why they began to worry so much. Children may disclose thoughts they hear. For example “I hear my sister yelling at me” can give you insight that the child may be reuminating over a situation that occured earlier.

Step Four: Notice two things you can smell.

It may be hard for the child to identify more than one smell. This is another great opportunity to encourage self-reflection.

You can ask what they notice about their skin or hair. This may be another opportunity for them to tell you about something bothering them, such as a tag or being upset about their hair.

If you find that the child is still worked up. Invite them to sit and take very deep breaths while they search. Here, you can teach a powerful coping skill all of its very own about deep breathing. All under the guise of this fun activity!

Also utilize yourself as tool here - demonstrate what deep breathing looks like.

Step Five: Notice one thing you can taste.

While this step only calls to find one thing, you can ask the child about what else they might taste and leave the activity on a light-hearted note about all the mixed-up flavors in their mouth. Talk about the toothpaste, breakfast, and the cracker they just ate.

For kids who need more physical calming and a reset, you can again invite them to sit and close their eyes. To get the child to focus, you can ask clarifying details of their meal.

The point is to not think about anything else by the sense at hand.

And repeat as needed!

This activity is great because it can be done almost anywhere at any time and can help redirect children and help with anxiety. Once kids get the hang of it this can turn into a great transitional activity at hard moments. This can be a group activity, a mindful moment in a car ride home, and a sensory rest for children with behavioral struggles.

For children struggling with ongoing anxiety, additional mindfulness practices would be strongly recommended. This technique is great to get kids and parents started!

The information and resources contained on this website are for informational purposes only and are not intended to assess, diagnose, or treat any medical and/or mental health disease or condition. The use of this website does not imply nor establish any type of therapist-client relationship. Furthermore, the information obtained from this site should not be considered a substitute for a thorough medical and/or mental health evaluation by an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional.

How to use the 5-4-3-2-1 Anxiety Strategy with Kids